ScriptMother

mike harper

Turning Point
Favorite Genres:
sci-fi
romance
action
horror
fantasy

I'm just a simple man. I work, I raise six sons, and I love my island wife hard. I go day by day fighting off the specter of battles both from my youth in Chicago to the battlefields in the Middle East. I abide by strong Catholic Christian core beliefs to love and accept even the folks that I'd want to throw piranas in their face and let their bodies lie in a pool filled with killer vampire gummi bears. I am nowhere near an aspiring writer nor want to enter the fray of the film industry. I would just like to one day see something on the big screen and say the same thing I did in countless places around the world...I made that. =) I have a hidden hobby of screenplay writing or jotting down creative ideas that may one day be passed along or found in a glass bottle floating in the sea. If by chance money can come my way from a poor script, I would be satisfied. As much as one can be swinging in a hammock by the side of the beach on a warm day with a cold glass of iced tea in hand. Thus, I am a simple man. Honor, noble, and a side of wickedness that comes out from time to time to keep life interesting and not boring.


Reviewer Rating:
Scripts: 54
Reviews: 45

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Recent Activity

mike harper completed a review for
5 months ago
Lavender feature
Genre: Action/Adventure,Sci-Fi/Fantasy,Drama
Review Rating:

The formatting and pacing is well done. There are a couple of details that can be easily fixed. For example, "spanish" is with a capital S. Watch for passive wording. "is wailing" needs to be "wails", "He starts crying" needs to be "He cries.", "is screaming," to "screams". There are minor spelling errors that can be easily taken care of, "Actiavting". Overall, I liked the story and pacing. It really drew me into your film. the mystery of the blue pills, the hierarchy of women. I was curious about why their fleet is so spread out if there is a legion of men left in the world- then who are they in conflicts with? Other women ruled nations? WHen Avery nabbed Lavender it was a great twist as you did a good job on misdirection. I viewed Avery as working for theQueen, until that point of the film. Krista's death was shocking and gut-punched. Well done! The dialogue pacing meandered a bit when Lavendar witnesses Krista's death and the group speaks about what's next. The flashback of the sexual assault of the Teen girl by a man came out of the left field. Is this the queen when she was younger? Who had the flashback, Constance? If so, link the action of her staring unfocused out the window and the memory flash. It will give context to the queen's tears. Four women to take down the regime without support is a tough feat, but the action sequences were nice and tight. I had a thought similar to "Equilibrium" (2002) movie. I love the fact that a great portion of your script passes the Bechdel-Wallace Test. Empowering and providing the wonderful female representation. The romantic scene with Lavender and Krista on the roof and led to the following morning was tasteful and gave me (a male) no inappropriate erotic thoughts other than two human beings loving one another in a relationship. I was curious to want to know how did they meet? What's the back story of a Duchess and a barkeep? When Lance mentions Constance's infertility it took me out of the movie for a moment. Why is it when men speak of women and whether they are a mother to a child it comes down to her womb? Maybe you can redirect that part by saying he knows for a fact she's not the birth mother and go with that string of thought. Lavender's repititive "normal, happy life" is either her quirk or overdone. The build-up to the final act was good. Mindful that the queen is a badass needs more context. How does a biochem genius such as Constance become a formidable warrior? The sacrifice at the end was good.

mike harper just claimed a review for a script.
5 months ago
Lavender feature
Genre: Action/Adventure,Sci-Fi/Fantasy,Drama
Logline: A young woman, living in a totalitarian, all-female empire, decides to reject continuing her mother's ruling legacy and joins an underground rebellion aimed at taking down the regime once and for all.
mike harper just purchased a review. Claim it here
5 months ago
To Be Determined feature
Genre: Drama,Horror
Logline: A veteran and a woman that loves him reunite when the world around them descends into inexplicable chaos. Their goal, stay together and stay alive.
mike harper just claimed a review for a script.
6 months ago
Long Live short
Genre: Drama
Logline: In a revolutionary time, a hard working young nurse, finds herself face to face with the old dictator, the leader of the country, after he fell ill and stepped into her emergency room, and must choose between saving him or killing him to save her country.
mike harper just claimed a review for a script.
6 months ago
Chain Link (Work in Progress) feature
Genre: Horror
Logline: Teens learn the hard way that if they don't comply and pass on the messages, they pay the price for breaking the link.
mike harper completed a review for
6 months ago
And Brother Shall Surrender Brother... short
Genre: Action/Adventure,Crime,Drama
Review Rating:

Two to the chest, one to the head. Hoorah. Lead, follow, get out of the way all day, every day. Hostile, mobile, lethal. These are common refrains when I was active duty. I can remember most of the Jody's. I have tattoos of EVERY BASE, EVERY DEPLOYMENT, EVERY LOCATION, and EVERY ENGAGEMENT in my mind and soul. I cry every time I watch movies like "Thank You For Your Service" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50LQGcb5knE), "Hurt Locker", "Brothers" (2009) and "American Sniper". My personal note is to make sure you get military details right and avoid drama by the numbers. The tv/movie business is flooded with shows with conspiracies, shadowy missions, experiments on soldiers, and PTSD-war survivors. I'd suggest if you want a police procedural with a realistic take on two soldiers - former a cop, the latter a confessed murderer - then show us the overwhelming facial expressions of their internal turmoil. Dialogue of "man", "brother" is not part of the majority of military personnel. Flip the script. For example, watch the webisodes "Lauren" on WIGS (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKYfdO5LFDs). What if in a scenario like that the victim killed her assailant once they returned from service. Not an N.C.I.S. style, but more aligned with the gritty tone in your script. The beat detective is the C.I.D. officer who discounted her assault/rape report (see "Lauren"). The victim-killer seeks the detective and confesses. Now, this leads to the former C.I.D. officer to debate, do I do what is moral/justifiable right or do what is legal and by law turn the killer in. The former choice leads to removing a mistake from their soul. The latter choice will expose that mistake and lead to detrimental consequences. Your script structure is correct, the pacing was average, but the characters were two-dimensional. For a short film or a pilot show, grab the viewer in the first 2- 3 minutes. I was able to visualize the body and the room. I didn't come to know the victim's personality through the room. Are there curtains or blinds on the window? Is the rug patterned? What's the condition and type of the furniture - modern,, classic, vintage? The law enforcement read straight from an uninteresting book to me. That's the truth. Make them our neighbor, someone we always see on patrol. Tie us through dialogue and their actions to be somebody we know or can relate to. Hope my feedback helps.

mike harper just claimed a review for a script.
6 months ago
And Brother Shall Surrender Brother... short
Genre: Action/Adventure,Crime,Drama
Logline: A police officer confronts a murder suspect, a fellow ex-Army Ranger, and must decide between his oath to uphold the law and loyalty to his brothers in arms.
mike harper uploaded a script.
6 months ago
To Be Determined feature
Genre: Drama
Logline: A veteran and the woman that loves him reunite when the world around them descends into inexplicable chaos. Their goal, stay together and stay alive.
mike harper completed a review for
6 months ago
Ring Three Bells for San Rafael feature
Genre: Thriller,Action/Adventure,Drama
Review Rating:

In the start, the plot and dialogue stumble between which character does what. That quickly ends when the prime characters board a boat and high-tail it out of the country and journey from the mob-hit tasker. Once the flu plague starts, a hitman becomes the town's savior. Keeping the era grounded in reality and character behavior truthful in their responses to the growing situation made it fairly easy to visualize the scenes. One thing to keep in mind, flyers and newspapers were the source of information (beyond radio) and murders/mob hits were not always national news. It would be helluva coincidental that any person arriving to help plague victims would have a hint of who the primary antagonist is. Having Rosa and Maria has the town intimatcy-for-rent in the world's oldest profession is halfway believable. For such a small village, wouldn't their "services" be rarely acquired because the poverty of the village and the social interaction would dampen how frequent men would seek their beds. How often do tourists arrive? I recommend watching “Fatima," https://variety.com/2020/film/reviews/fatima-review-1234750641/ for inspiration and world-building assistance. Moreover, consider that the Great Depression struck America, world leaders were saber-rattling, World War Two was on the horizon, https://www.nps.gov/fost/learn/historyculture/welcome-to-1935.htm. The lose of Sal, even for a mob hitman, would have more of an emotional impact on Joe. That can be shown as you did with Rosa's adopted father's death. Wouldn't burning clothes or the dead be what would realistically happen or would it be mass burial? Asking for personal knowledge. Overall, this script is great and offers twists. I would have sworn Father Ortega was part of the mafia network, until that one moment that kick-started the final act. This would impact the Colonel's arrival and the groups' interactions. Suspicion and anxiety would be in the air.

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Rise
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On an Pan-Pacific flight, a supernatural creature plague passengers. They soon discover that this was a prelude to something much worse to come.

Earth's Doorstep
Draft #2
Genre: Sci-Fi/Fantasy
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A husband and wife fight to reunite after their starship crashes. That maybe the least of humanity's trouble.

Varkazana Ascension
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They were once sentinels to protect humanity. That era is over. The werewolf apocalypse has begun.

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Aberrant
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Genre: Sci-Fi/Fantasy,Romance,Drama
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In a world much like ours, a woman is pulled into events that will forever change her life on her 25th birthday.

Journey
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Genre: Sci-Fi/Fantasy
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Henry and Hope are thrust into a journey of wonders and dangers as they shrink through the quantum multi-universe wondering if they will make it back home.

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Mia doesn't know it, but she's the last of the 36 righteous women that hold back God's wrath on humankind.

The First Mage
Draft #5
Genre: Sci-Fi/Fantasy
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In a world where man and magic are new, Enosh must battle evil to save his people.

Mage's Price
Draft #3
Genre: Sci-Fi/Fantasy,Action/Adventure
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Real magic breaks the laws of the world. Jesse is soon to find out the mage's price.

Mage's Journey
Draft #3
Genre: Sci-Fi/Fantasy
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Enosh, the First Mage, must journey across ancient Africa to find the cure to save his wife.

Unring The Bell
Draft #3
Genre: Horror,Sci-Fi/Fantasy
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Born in the worst ways to judge us all by the sound of the bell we rung.

To Be Determined
Draft #2
Genre: Drama,Horror
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A veteran and a woman that loves him reunite when the world around them descends into inexplicable chaos. Their goal, stay together and stay alive.

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Reviews

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Thriller
Action/Adventure
Drama
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Thriller
Mystery/Suspense
Drama
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Horror
Thriller
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