(Revised script) The Mage is an epic tale of magic and family. Enosh, the progenitor mage travels a world where fallen angels and monsters struggle for control of the new world. But when fate hurtles him toward a succubus and her Fallen lovers to save his people's life, he battles insurmountable foes.
Concept - Good
Characters - Fantastical and larger than life.
Story - Two fallen angels Shemhazai and Azazel battle Enosh, a human Mage who fights them to save his wife's life.
Plot/structure - Good versus evil.A moral lesson about the evil of excess and debauched living.
Scenes - Generally structured okay, some formatting errors.
Theme - Strength comes from inside. Family is everything.
Genre - Fantasy
Pacing - It moves along at a good...
The premise of your story is good: action from the first scene to the last. I was immediately drawn into your main character, Enoch, and his role engendered empathy, righteous anger, vengeance, hope, and more emotions than I care to list. The dark goddess, Naamah, and the two fallen angels engendered the opposite emotional responses. All of which I credit to your writing skill. The cast of characters—in Enoch’s village and in Naamah’s lair—suppor...
A mystical camcorder helps two young friends see into the past. They vow to use the camera to change lives for the better. But does seeing into the past change the future?
In the wake of his father's death, a teenager named Anthony along with his best friend Derek have to figure out why aliens are invading earth and killing people.
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