ScriptMother

Abdirizak Hirsi

Establishing Shot

Reviewer Rating:
Scripts: 3
Reviews: 2

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Recent Activity

Abdirizak Hirsi uploaded a script.
2 months ago
Michelle & Kim (15 pages) television
Genre: Action/Adventure
Logline: Michelle searches for a killer, after his husband died. Sooner, there’s more st stake. Accomplices by Kim
Abdirizak Hirsi just purchased a review. Claim it here
4 months ago
The Silver Bullet feature
Genre: Action/Adventure
Logline: An aspirant wrestler finds out about the plot from secret organization and attempt to take over the world by an agent. She needs to find the formula and prevent it from falling into the wrong hands.
Abdirizak Hirsi completed a review for
4 months ago
Chain Link (First 15) feature
Genre: Horror
Review Rating:

I think the idea you created is quite interesting, showing a great blend of characters and storyline, merging in one-piece. An antagonist in a horrors scene seems to be ruthless in his/her goal and that what makes it fascinating. The idea is really fabricating and yet, has its own twist and excitement occurs in one place to another. The creation of the scenes is character is somewhat relatable, cultured. The story is fascinating and it has a journey. It tells the plot about the killer, killing young adults but it doesn't give a motive do it. Maybe it's only a beginning, it'd be interesting where it goes. The structure of the first 15 pages are quite standard, which it can be improved. It is quite professional, the way it laid out, but in order to break it into the Hollywood, it should become more unique and amazing. It's quite fair and it can better. Character development is one of the weakest of the script. The main problem of the script is the description of the way the characters are dressed. This is unnecessary and the main rule of introduction characters is not telling what they dressed, unless it is specified. Otherwise, keep it in bare minimum. The dialogue is very good, it gives the power to the story and was crucial for the journey. The real feedback for this screenplay in the first 15 pages is the introduction of characters. Everything else is good but the dressing need to be cut out unless it is pertinent to the story. The another way in improving the script, although not necessarily, but if inspired to break into Hollywood is the structure. It brings one action to another. One way to improve is to have a good action and cool on another. Getting too many actions are not needed and it may not work.

Abdirizak Hirsi just claimed a review for a script.
4 months ago
Chain Link (First 15) feature
Genre: Horror
Logline: Teens learn the hard way that if they don't comply and pass on the messages, they pay the price for breaking the link.
Abdirizak Hirsi just claimed a review for a script.
4 months ago
Mad Talent short
Genre: Comedy,Horror
Logline: A schizophrenic man loses his sanity after his singing audition for a talent show goes wrong.
Abdirizak Hirsi uploaded a script.
4 months ago
The Silver Bullet feature
Genre: Action/Adventure
Logline: An aspirant wrestler finds out about the plot from secret organization and attempt to take over the world by an agent. She needs to find the formula and prevent it from falling into the wrong hands.
Abdirizak Hirsi just joined ScriptMother!
4 months ago

Scripts

The Silver Bullet
Draft #2
Genre: Action/Adventure
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An aspirant wrestler finds out about the plot from secret organization and attempt to take over the world by an agent. She needs to find the formula and prevent it from falling into the wrong hands.

Michelle & Kim (15 pages)
Draft #1
Genre: Action/Adventure
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Michelle searches for a killer, after his husband died. Sooner, there’s more st stake. Accomplices by Kim

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