I think the idea you created is quite interesting, showing a great blend of characters and storyline, merging in one-piece. An antagonist in a horrors scene seems to be ruthless in his/her goal and that what makes it fascinating. The idea is really fabricating and yet, has its own twist and excitement occurs in one place to another. The creation of the scenes is character is somewhat relatable, cultured. The story is fascinating and it has a journey. It tells the plot about the killer, killing young adults but it doesn't give a motive do it. Maybe it's only a beginning, it'd be interesting where it goes. The structure of the first 15 pages are quite standard, which it can be improved. It is quite professional, the way it laid out, but in order to break it into the Hollywood, it should become more unique and amazing. It's quite fair and it can better. Character development is one of the weakest of the script. The main problem of the script is the description of the way the characters are dressed. This is unnecessary and the main rule of introduction characters is not telling what they dressed, unless it is specified. Otherwise, keep it in bare minimum. The dialogue is very good, it gives the power to the story and was crucial for the journey. The real feedback for this screenplay in the first 15 pages is the introduction of characters. Everything else is good but the dressing need to be cut out unless it is pertinent to the story. The another way in improving the script, although not necessarily, but if inspired to break into Hollywood is the structure. It brings one action to another. One way to improve is to have a good action and cool on another. Getting too many actions are not needed and it may not work.
-The concept of the story is different and good. I thoroughly enjoyed the idea that you brought into your story. -The story is quite intriguing and I kinda enjoyed reading the pages. It gone from one place to another. It also unleashed the power of your character. -Structure of the script is very good and it was nice and neat. It was well structured and done in a professional manner. Even though it can be improved but it's pretty been well organized and it is quite good enough to enter into the industry -Development of the character can be improved. -The dialogue. I cannot be able to fault any of them and the speech and words are fantastic. Conclusion: the concept is quite good because it has somewhat of the originality, the story is exciting and the structure is almost pinpoint. the dialogue is definitely pinpoint but the development can improve.
An aspirant wrestler finds out about the plot from secret organization and attempt to take over the world by an agent. She needs to find the formula and prevent it from falling into the wrong hands.