Jacob obsesses over plants as a result of his parents’ death, but when he stumbles into a thoughtful young lady named Emma, his life takes a turn towards happiness.
I hope to receive some feedback on my short-film screenplay including the narrative itself. I have also got a pitch deck if anyone are interested in seeing the visual themes of the film.
Any feedback and critique would be greatly appreciated!
Using ScriptMother's Criteria:
The Concept is not strong/original.
The logline/first ten pages does not draw the reader.
The scenes are not well-written.
The protagonist/antagonist is not compelling enough.
The dialogue does not drive the story/character.
The conflict is real/genuine.
The Pacing is okay.
The Climax/Resolution satisfies the reader.
The script does not read well.
Most of my advice is in the many Script notes. I always fi...
A young writer has just written her first novel and two companies want to get the rights to publish her book. She goes back to her old town to seal a deal with one company in privacy not knowing that the other company had other plans of obtaining rights from her against her will.
A pastor's estranged son begins intercepting strange TV broadcasts from a mysterious deity, known only as The Shepherd, that inspire a novel and radical religious awakening of his own.
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