Sprinkles, a stuffed unicorn, and his best friend/roommate, Kaw, are both going about their days when Kaw decides to take Sprinkles to a club. Everything is going well until a trio of vicious animals attack the club. Before they know it, Sprinkles and Kaw find themselves on the run as one of them is being targeted for an experiment called "Project Sugarcoat" run by a mythical madman named Dr. Chimera.
Contains pervasive language, strong crude sexual content, drug use and bloody violence.
just some ways I think you can make your story great.
You do a good job quickly establishing that even though there are talking animals
this is not a kids show (if the title didn't give it away already). F-bomb on
the first page, murder on the fourth.
Love the contrast of a cutesy unicorn and stuffed animal crow working out and smoking...
The description were long but lacked that powerful imagery killer sentences.
The entrance of a flash back after the kaw & sprinkle scene is not fully understood.
The sounds wear not capitalized.
MAKE SURE TO...