by David Kyle Anderson
142 pages
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Overall, I think this is a very solid script. All the characters are complex and three dimensional that I care about literally everyone. My biggest piece of feedback is making the bond between Idunn and Will a tiny bit more believable, and setting up Tess and Hayden's sexual relationship. Other than that, well done!
Overall, I thought this was a decent sequel episode that you've written. With more editing and revising, I think this could turn out to be incredible! Good luck!
Overall, it's a funny, over-the-top concept that I think audiences will appreciate. The story itself needs more dimension. If the plot and dialogue don't match the creativity of the concept, it will ultimately fall flat. There's definitely room for this script to grow.