Joseph S.

Hi Hunter, Nice work. You have a grammar issue with periods. 70% of your sentences lack them. It’s all in your dialogue, the last line, unless it’s a...

Firstly, when you introduce your main character you should have a last name for him. Even if it’s not used, we need his last name. It not only reveals...

Basically, I feel this is a very good first draft. There’s some strong ideas here, but they get undermined by clunky dialogue, and some typos. I try t...