A former MMA fighter looking to bounce back from an unfortunate event that costs him his career. With a help of some unidentified people, things look a little bit dangerous.
After Nemitallion lost his fight with Dave due to illegal drugs in
“his body”, he disappears and reappears in three years. With
his reappearance he seems like a changed man. With this
change it doesn’t seem like a good change but change for the
bad.
With his meeting with Two he has decided to work with him and
go up against Mr Elbanco, the biggest cartel owner in Mexico.
In conclusions:
A) follow the rule of screenplay. Dont tell - SHOW.
Eg: pg1- The last description read:- As the fight was at its last round, their both managers shouting loudly to advice and encourage their fighter.
☆ You clearly told us but didn't show.
Remember. In screenplay you only write what you see and hear. Not what a character thinks.
How you could have shown:
EG:- A pretty brown woman goes round with a card. The card reads: Roun...
A Spanish Don is sent to eighteenth-century San Antonio to construct the Missions. He must overcome the wilderness and Comanche to reunite with his fiancee and establish his family's legacy.
Lord Malcolm continues to capture Jedi from across the galaxy which causes Master Oscar and his Padawan Connor to go into hiding on the Planet Soiven. Meanwhile Master Marc Kena and his Padawan Chelsea Wilson search for the ancient Jedi and Sith scriptures before the Empire finds them
A man on a mission to find revenge. He goes through lots of trouble to succeed and soon to find who he's looking for while he's being chased down by the bad guys at the same time.
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