Santa Claus is despondent about Christmas and sits on the steps of a family home to ponder what has changed.
Cupid appears with a gift and they end up in an argument about who is treaded in whose holiday. Santa relents to Cupid’s queries about what is wrong and Cupid seems to have an idea to fix it with love.
In the family home, Mom dines alone.
The following morning the family gathers at the tree to open gifts but this will be a Christmas the parents won’t forget in a hurry.
Santa and Cupid rejoice in the success of their mission.
I had to re-read this a handful of times in order to figure out what was happening. Maybe I need to try again but I didn't really understand the progression of the story.
It would have made more sense if the couple were brought closer together as a result of the gifts of love, but instead they fall further apart.
The Christmas morning scene doesn't make much sense either. Why did Santa have to give presents of love to the child if it didn...
Using ScriptMother's Criteria:
The Concept is not strong/original, but not bad for a short script.
The logline/first ten pages does draw the reader. This caught my eye, because I've written about Cupid, also. So I like to read/see stories with Cupid in it.
The scenes are fairly well-written.
The protagonist/antagonist is not compelling enough for a normal story, but is fair for a short.
The dialogue does drive the story/character.
The confl...
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