Thirst for Blue Diamonds feature
#Crime #Action/Adventure #Thriller
By
Ishaan
Teja
Four friends stumble upon a fortune following a seemingly trivial encounter with a French mobster. The violent game of cat and mouse that ensues changes their lives forever. How far will one go for Blue Diamonds?
Awards
Approved
Summary
1 Reviews |
111 pages |
8 months ago
|
Draft 1
Blue Diamonds are some of the rarest stones on the planet. After a recent jewelry store heist in France, a bunch of Blue Diamonds have gone missing, despite police having caught the people responsible. The story follows these Blue Diamonds as they find their way into the hands of four friends in San Diego, California. These unsuspecting young adults have their world turned upside down as they attempt to keep the diamonds in the hopes that they can sell them for a fortune. The French mobster responsible for the heist, having nearly escaped with the diamonds and his life, will do anything to get them back.
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It really was a well-considered story. As I mentioned in several notes, my only high-level plot recommendation is to make both the protagonists and antagonists more relevant to the outcome (instead of several elements progressing due to luck or coincidence) as you near the climax.
Reflecting back on it, I really like the twist you inserted in the final few paragraphs, but am wondering if you can make it feel more earned. Maybe have Florence ta...
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