Presto Change-O Phoebe television
#Animation #Action/Adventure
Two kids from Earth befriend a shapeshifting girl from another dimension, and discover an evil plot that threatens to destroy the multiverse.
Awards
Approved
Summary
1 Reviews |
29 pages |
3 years ago
|
Draft 2
The main character, Phoebe, is a girl from a parallel universe with incredible shapeshifting powers. She can transform various parts of her body into whatever weapons or equipment the situation calls for. After crash-landing in 21st century England, Phoebe befriends two kids named Emily and Jack, and together they set off to find out what caused her to arrive there—and to stop a villain who threatens both of their universes.
Industry Reviews
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Peer Reviews
Improper formatting and unnatural dialogue distract from a story that might otherwise be interesting
Read a screenplay. If you read another script you will see what formatting should look like and why your script does not look how it’s supposed to. I would also look a little more into your characters and try and imbue them with more personality and character traits. When you define these personalities and make sure that the character’s dialogue matches the personality, the dialogue will seem more lively.
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