Wanna See

City on Fire - Chapter II: First Light

By Elaine Mroz-Bunnell

In a city on the edge of oppression, a lone rider tries to escape, and encounters a ghost from long since past.

Peer Rating: 53%
Industry Rating: N/A
1 Reviews | 23 pages | 1 month ago | Draft 1


Pondering how the world go to this point, Ryder (Age 26) makes the hard choice to leave her quiet but underclass life in the slums of a futuristic city of false promises. However, leaving the walls has long since been outlawed and she is trailed and caught by an elite policing Android called the Darkrunner. Man and machine clash, and Ryder is almost taken out, but is saved by the entrance of Simon Cain (Age 56), who had been tracking the Darkrunner's radio signal. After Cain hastily patches Ryder's wounds, the two concoct a plan to take down the proto-fascist government that has been left unchecked for two long, one Cain seemingly had a regrettable part in helping to rise. Cain fashions an explosive out of Ryder's motorbike, who sneaks into the central tower of the city in disguise as the Darkrunner, with Cain running recon and support from his lab. Things take a turn, however, when the man at the top, Micheal Wolfe (early 50s) finds out what's going on. He traps Ryder in his office, and the two discuss why Wolfe does what he does. Both Ryder and Wolfe almost seem to be pulling each other to their side, until Wolfe finally snaps, pushing Ryder out of the window. Knowing it's too late for her, she throws the explosive as she falls, heavily damaging the tower and injuring Wolfe, but ultimately unable to kill him. Cain rushes to her body, and a crowd gathers in amazement that Wolfe is still just a man. A man who can be hurt, taken down. There is hope in the air, and Cain vows Ryder's death will not be in vain, fading into the gathering of people.

Industry Reviews

Peer Reviews

Overall, I thought this was a decent sequel episode that you've written. With more editing and revising, I think this could turn out to be incredible! Good luck!

1 month ago |
Cyle Brooks Top Reviewer

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