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Summary
1 Reviews |
9 pages |
4 years ago
|
Draft 1
9 pages... just read it, will you?
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Writer, awesome concept. Really great short with a great twist. That being said, the twist is pretty easy to spot early on in the story.
I had difficulty with the dialog. Mary seemed to speak with an older voice than her character was meant to be. She is introduced as 40 but some of her dialog comes off as elderly.
Additionally, there were more than several spelling errors. Please proofread your material before posting it for review. I found...
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