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The Beauty of the Defeated short

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#Drama

An obese security guard who dreams of becoming a cop has a life changing altercation with an overweight gangster wannabe teenager.

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0 Reviews | 17 pages | 5 years ago | Draft 1

##drama ##short #self-worth

Hi screenwriters!

I would love to get your feedback! Been working on this baby for far too long...
Here are some questions!

1) Is it clear why the protagonists goal is important to him?
2) It is clear what the consequences are if he fails?
3) Do these consequences feel deeply important to him?
4) Do you believe his motivation throughout the story?
5) Does the Dialogue and action feel authentic or forced?
6) Does this feel like a story worth telling?
7) Any general notes?

I can't thank this community enough... seriously. The feedback on here is vital to everyone!

Thanks!

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The Beauty of the Defeated short

Sign In to see % Rating

#Drama

Awards

Approved

Summary

Industry Reviews

No Industry Reviews

Peer Reviews

No Peer Reviews

Recommended for You

You Want To Hear A Joke?

Following the death of his mother, a playwright loses his purpose. He goes out into the middle of the ocean for inspiration and gets stuck there. In his last moments alive, he begins to tell his life in the form of a standup routine told to an imaginary audience.

SHOCKED TO DEATH

After discovering an insane asylum psychiatrist is administering electro-shock treatments to patients for sexual gratification, an idealistic social worker puts her job and life on the line to stop him before her beloved patients are shocked to death.

Denise

A young writer has just written her first novel and two companies want to get the rights to publish her book. She goes back to her old town to seal a deal with one company in privacy not knowing that the other company had other plans of obtaining rights from her against her will.

BlogMother

MAIN MENU

The Beauty of the Defeated short

Sign In to see % Rating

#Drama

Awards

Approved

Summary

Industry Reviews

No Industry Reviews

Peer Reviews

No Peer Reviews

Recommended for You

You Want To Hear A Joke?

Following the death of his mother, a playwright loses his purpose. He goes out into the middle of the ocean for inspiration and gets stuck there. In his last moments alive, he begins to tell his life in the form of a standup routine told to an imaginary audience.

SHOCKED TO DEATH

After discovering an insane asylum psychiatrist is administering electro-shock treatments to patients for sexual gratification, an idealistic social worker puts her job and life on the line to stop him before her beloved patients are shocked to death.

Denise

A young writer has just written her first novel and two companies want to get the rights to publish her book. She goes back to her old town to seal a deal with one company in privacy not knowing that the other company had other plans of obtaining rights from her against her will.

BlogMother

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