The exterminators is a sweet half-hour comedy that offers some real insight into the human condition. The plot, while not particularly exciting, does the job it needs to do, and the script really excels in the characters and the character's relationships. It offers some real insight and humanity and understanding into how to maintain a successful relationship. However, I would dig deeper into that and hope and try to marry it up in some way to the external plot and the idea of extermination. For example, when Dougs kills these animals is he in some metaphorical way also destroying his relationship or his dream? The dialogue was also very believable and relatable though it did carry on at times for a bit too long. Overall I recommend cutting down on the dialogue, rethinking the opening scenes, and trying to find a way to allow Doug to discover the insight about his marriage for himself, rather than being told it by Fred.

If the intention of this short is to condemn the endemic violence of America and the toxic masculinity of frat boy culture then I salute you. And there were some intense action scenes and brutal violence on the script - that part was well executed. But the underlying story dynamics just weren't there. Currently, this is just an orgy of violence with very little story or character development and no greater meaning. I recommend finding clarity on what you want to say and then designing your protagonist as the vehicle for that argument. I would recommend listening to this lecture, by the writer who wrote the Chernobyl series, on what a story is - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSX-DROZuzY

You've got a fantastic premise here and the script is really set alight by the brilliance of the dialogue. The plot makes sense but what really needs work is the underlying story and the thematic argument. This is the hard work but if done correctly will really make the script exceptional. I would concentrate in the next draft on Hank's flaw and his arc and how that arc expresses the thematic argument. For me that argument is around the area of anarchy against order and it may be something along the lines of “Love can only flourish in a world that is not controlled.” I would recommend a podcast by Craig Mazin, the writer of TV Series Chernobyl, who looks at at writing from the inside out and places the protagonist first which is what this story now needs. It’s an episode of scriptnotes called “How to write a movie” and is available here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSX-DROZuzY

Monster is a wonderfully short and entertaining skit or sketch. It's got a fantastic premise and great comedic timing. But the ending is a little too familiar and is a joke that we have all seen before so I'd either push it further as I have outlined above or find another way to change or subvert it. This will then meet the expectations of the audience which have been raised by seeing something new and original and fresh in the beginning of the script. Overall, it's good as it is but does need that extra push to make it great.

Overall this was a great read with some wonderful imagination and original ideas. It needs a little bit more clarity and I think that the midpoint was slightly weak but other than that it was a very intriguing and interesting script with a great revelatory story ending