https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2193759/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 – Christine https://www.imdb.com/name/nm2194457/?ref_=nv_sr_1?ref_=nv_sr_1 – Lee Ann I lives in South Africa and collaborate with Lee Ann Riddle from USA. We have been writing together since 2003 and finally took the plunge into producing in 2019. We are currently in post-production with our short film "My neighbor Earl" (2020). Progress can be followed on imdb.com and Facebook. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt11114394/?ref_=fn_al_tt_1 https://www.facebook.com/groups/584878578750561/ Our short screenplay "6 Equals 9" has been picked up for production by Ron Harris of Stargazersfilmco on Script Revolution. Our short screenply "Ghost o'clock" was selected as semi-finalist in New York City International Screenplay awards. Our feature screenplay "Call of the Crazy" was selected as finalist in the Pitch Now Screenplay Competition. "Wages of Sin", a horror we were hired to work on by Aaron Robson was released on DVD in 2007. It received a nomination for the Shockerfest International Film Festival. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0825342/ Our short screenplay "Luck of the Draw" produced and directed by SJ Munoz Main from Tica Productions, starring Chris Mulkey, James Duval and Kristoffer Winters. This short is now available on Shorts TV. It was accepted into the "Dallas Film Festival", "Jackson Hole Film Festival", "Palm Springs Film Festival" and the "Rhode Island Film Festival" The screenplay for Luck also won 2nd place in the Writesafe Second Quarter 2005 contest.. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1090230/?ref_=nm_knf_i1 Unproduced feature screenplay wins - "Call of the Crazy" was selected as finalist in the Pitch Now Screenplay Competition 2019. - "Flight of the Dragonfly' – Drama in collaboration with SJ Main of Tica Productions - 2nd (finalist) in the drama category of the International Family Film Festival and was 1 of 25 semi-finalists in the Domani Vision Film Festival - 'B.ustin' U.nidentified D.udes' - Scifi comedy - Finalist in 'Writesafe 1st Quarter 2005' contest - 'Operation Santa Claus' - Drama Comedy - Semi-Finalist in 'Writesafe 4th Quarter 2005' contest - 'Ghostwriter' Teenage drama - was a Finalist in 'Writesafe 4th Quarter 2005' contest - We received "finalist" (2nd) in the drama category of the "International Family Film Festival" for "Flight of the Dragonfly", a collaboration with SJ Munoz Main. - 'Wide Open' – Drama- won Honorable Mention in 'Spec Scriptacular South Africa' contest - 'Tokoloshe' placed 5th in 'Writesafe 3rd Quarter 2004' contest - ”Call of the Crazy' won Honorable mention in 'Writesafe 3rd Quarter 2004' contest - 'Death Midwives' was a Finalist in the 'Writesafe 4th Quarter 2004' contest - 'Seven Trumpets' was a Finalist in 'Writesafe 4th Quarter 2004'contest Unproduced short screenplay wins - "Ghost o'clock" was selected as semi-finalist in New York City International Screenplay awards 2019. - 'Earl' was a Semi-Finalist in 'Writesafe 1st Quarter 2005' contest - 'Dead of the Night' placed 3rd in the First Heat of NYCMidnight contest 2004
In the first paragraph you describe a lot of things about where they are going, who gave them the assignment and such. You need to find ways to "show" this instead of writing the information. If this were to be filmed, a viewer would not have that information. Quentin and Martin sit in the parking lot waiting for the clock to turn to 8:58 so they can enter the museum and steal Scream. QUENTIN Now, Roman told us to wait until 8:58 This is redundant. QUENTIN Yeah. In 9th grade. You've already mentioned 9th grade in a previous line of dialogue. QUENTIN What is a fucking movie? I don't fully understand this. Your writing is pretty good and you have a story to tell. I think the most important this is to have something to hook your writers. Why should we care about these characters? What do they have to lose if they don't complete their task. You need to look at the formatting of your script. It looks like you've centered your dialogue. There are a number of free applications you can use for writing screenplays, like Trelby. There's a specific reason why you need your script properly formatted, as it will then work out to 1 page being 1 minute in film. I do think you had a good twist at the end, but it seems like he just shot. You may need to setup that up better so that it's more apparent that it was accidental. Great job on finishing a short script. Keep writing.
It's very difficult to review this as it is not really a screenplay. You may want to try some free apps to write with, ex Trelby. I can get a bit of characterization as Edgar seems willing to do anything if the price is right. Shawn does not like to get his hands dirty when it comes to murder or scaring people but in general he is not a reliable guy as he pretends he never made a deal with Edgar. You have a lot of conflict which is good. This seems to be more of an excerpt of a bigger story than a complete short story that can stand on its own. As it is, neither of your characters are very likeable, or at least relatable. I'd suggest that you give them more depth so that the reader/viewer is hooked and invested in the story to want to keep reading. I hope that my review is somehow helpful. Keep writing.
An elderly couple confront unresolved rivalry when they receive a visit from an estranged family member.
A young mom and a carefree petrol head both suffer with personal defeat after severe losses resulting from the same tragic incident.
When an inebriated self-proclaimed hero saves a woman on the edge, her response is not what he expects.