Overall I liked it, a really good start and gripping enough to want to read on and see how the story pans out, I enjoyed the introduction to the protagonists back story and look forward to getting to know them better and experiencing how they progress as the story proceeds. The other characters we are introduced to have longevity and are interesting enough to want to know how their relationship develops with the lead already which can be a challenge when writing and feel a loyalty to the protagonist, the other characters are as important to allow the lead to grow and develop an interesting and inviting story for the reader/watcher.
I would very much like to read more from this writer, they have a natural style and have displayed that they have written before and have talent. I would still be interested to find out how the story progresses and how the story works around a cow and what its powers are. The writer has demonstrated a good level of skill and a natural flow.
Overall I felt that the concept did not grip me, it was laboured with poor dialogue in places. There are missing words and spelling mistakes. The descriptions of places and people were very good and I feel that the writer is a novelist or story writer and not a script writer. Re-visit it and work on the dialogue, listen to how people talk and understand military speak and references, this can be achieved by watching military and police films or series. Things like 'We have lost comms with Alpha 2 and 3' if people are using radio's than they are using call signs. Think about making the dialogue more stick and following, the use of 'beat' was overpowering and distracting, it is down to the actor to deliver the speech and trust a beat will be used naturally when a dialogue is underway.
Ever wondered what the life of a Henchmen is like, when your boss is trying to take over the world and all you want to do is drink coffee and not killed by the the an inept secret agent.