My name’s John. I’ve recently started getting into screenwriting after failing to get my fantasy series published and figured on checking out a new possible path for it. I’ve been wanting to read some screenplays to try and learn how to do it. Please don’t be offended if me criticism isn’t perfect, especially on formatting as I’m still learning.
Let me first start out by saying that sexual assault is a very important and serious topic and so the examination of such is a good concept that is really hot right now in movies and literature. With that said, I’ll start with what needs work as that seems like why you would submit for your work to be read. I didn’t really love the character of Alicia. While I couldn’t exactly pinpoint what was wrong it seemed like she just wasn’t real and that her emotions fluctuated too much to the extremes. Speaking of extremes, that’s what Peter and Spencer were. Peter was extremely good and Spencer was extremely bad. Benoit also wasn’t too developed which mas a little bit of sense because he’s not even as secondary character. Th dialogue didn’t sound super realists. What did work in the screenplay was the story. It was short but the suspense when they went to the club was effective. The story followed the typical literary structure which made it easy to follow.