Consider this... This script is really good for the advert. Maybe for a lotion company or a body spray company or something. In the foyer scene, you said she took off her clothes. Then in the bathroom scene, you said she strips. Is she getting naked twice? How? I think you should drop a hint of what those two are about to do. Maybe his hand goes up to her dress just before the door closes. In general, the script needs some more elaborating. I get it. As writers, we know what we want to show. But we must find ways to make others understand us in an entertaining way. This script has a lot of mystery. It could be that a girl prepares for a night of sex. It could also be that a girl prepares to lose her virginity. It could also be that a girl prepares for a night of BDSM. Or it could be something else entirely. All I'm saying is make it clear what it is.