Sorry I'm gonna be really honest here. I'm no professional btw. Couldn't follow what was going on. (Although I do have ADHD tbf.) I kept almost getting hooked but not for long and it fizzled out. I think it was a bit boring because it rellies on us caring about characters who are stock but nothing more. The main guy seemed too generic. I don't know if this is just me but the fight scenes don't make me feel much at all. Probably because you haven't hooked me in to the characters and plot first. The dialogue was ok-ish. A bit cliché, forced and overly edgy. But relaxing, simple and natural. (As apposed to complicated and witty. Although witty is better, simple dialogue has it's charm.) It's kinda like a generic tough guy just going around having fights. Good show don't tell. I liked the places and atmospheres you created.
Secrets run rife in the vampire monarchy as the heir tries to advert her future as the vampire queen.