Story: The story is serviceable. Four gay guys and their wacky adventures and drama. I could see that becoming a hit. Execution: I found some of the comedic scenes to be extremely raunchy and overtly sexual, and it actually made me squirm a bit in my seat. The most jarring part was when Jacob was taunting Donovon in his office, talking about swallowing his seed. Maybe it's just not my sense of humor? It was extremely much. I did like the Brigs character. This script's standout line was: "LGBTQ-HIJKLMNOP." Really good stuff there. I liked the idea of Ray and Eric being reunited, and that was a decently solid cliffhanger. I do feel like Eric should have been mentioned before the ending so that the audience could've cared more. The grammar was very poor, and I found myself having to reread multiple lines and try to make sense of them. Commas were used correctly, and some sentences had no punctuation at all. I understand you probably weren't going for an Emmy, and were instead trying to create a fun, relatable comedy for the masses to enjoy. It's just a lot to handle sometimes, with the over-sexualized humor. I only laughed one through the script, and that was at the Brigs line I stated up top. I liked the character of Ray the most, but it's because there wasn't really a lot of competition. Xavier's a good friend, but I don't really KNOW much about him -- although I understand it's just the first episode. I just felt, as characters, they were incredibly flat. Or maybe it's because of the dialogue that I found them flat. With all due respect, some of the lines were very forced and void of comedic timing. Overall, I found myself not very invested in the story for the reasons I've stated, although it is not completely without its good elements here and there.