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Here were my thoughts for your script: 1. Concept - Supernatural horror of any kinds is hard to make original or fresh nowadays. I liked the twist of the people being led by a dumb and greedy producer from in his own house hiding away. 2. Story - The story, although being decent enough to remember, was fairly predictable in my opinion. I'd throw in more twists and such so it's not too predictable. 3. Structure - The script was pretty easy to follow along with. There were very few moments where I got a bit lost, but otherwise, formatting and overall structure were good! 4. Character Development - I liked the majority of the characters. My personal favorite characters were Hector and Wendy. Hector's ridiculous attitude was funny and Wendy was a pretty strong protagonist and her personality was great! 5. Dialogue - The dialogue felt pretty realistic and seemed to flow naturally. One of my biggest nitpicks is that there are a couple of moments where there's some repetitive dialogue that could be removed or reworded. 6. Conclusion - In all honesty, I'm not a big fan of supernatural horror because of how much of an overused horror trope it is. However, this script I've gotta say was fairly well written. As I stated above, if the repetitive moments in dialogue are either removed or reworded and there's more substance to the story to make it a bit less predictable, then I can see this script getting much more attention!
My thoughts on this script: 1. Concept - The concept of performing a seance to talk to the dead is nothing new or original in Hollywood. It's honestly just a cop out to horror and suspense to make things easier. 2. Story - The story was decent. A fake magician blinded by greed helps a grieving woman talk to her dead daughter, but gets his comeuppance can be a great story, but it was honestly just too predictable. 3. Structure - This is the strongest point in the script. It was pretty easy to read and was mostly well formatted. 4. Character Development - With short scripts, it's hard to accomplish character development in a short amount of time, but it can be done. I feel like it fell a bit flat only because we don't know much about the characters except one is a fake magician and the other is an old lady consumed by grief. 5. Dialogue - This is a dialogue heavy script. I would suggest taking out any unnecessary lines and replace them with a few more action lines to even it out. 6. Conclusion - I think this script can be something really good. If you add something new to the story or change up the concept a bit first and then work your way through, then I can see this getting more attention.
Here are my thoughts on your script: 1. Concept - I liked the concept that you went with, but there's still some potential to make it stronger. 2. Story - The story was pretty simple, yet kinda charming to read in a sense. Two guys just wanna hang out and have a gaming night until one gets uncomfortable over the fact that he didn't know his friend's mom was a lesbian. 3. Structure - Formatting and structure were pretty good for the most part. I didn't really catch myself struggling to read or follow along. 4. Character Development - Although we get to know a bit about Matthew and Tim, I personally think they are slightly underdeveloped, same with Matthew's mom. A few more details without full blown exposition would be useful. 5. Dialogue - A great majority of the dialogue felt genuine and realistic. A couple moments felt forced, but other than that, pretty good! 6. Conclusion - I personally really liked this script! It was a nice and easy script to read and simply enjoy. With the few edits and revisions, I think this script would be fantastic!
After getting fed up with evil winning in the end of horror movies, a man decides to take matters into his own hands.
Carrie's week is going miserably and camp doesn't seem to help. Neither does the fact that there's a killer loose on the campgrounds hellbent on being remembered by his childhood bullies.
After dying in a car accident, Johnny Seth is about to face judgment, that is until Satan gets God's permission to bring Johnny back to life, only for his plan to go south.