Wanna See


By Bruce Vancamp

A young woman, living in a totalitarian, all-female empire, decides to reject continuing her mother's ruling legacy and joins an underground rebellion aimed at taking down the regime once and for all.

Draft #2
Peer Rating: 80%
Industry Rating: 40%
Draft 2: 80%
Draft 1: 47%
2 Reviews | 118 pages | 5 months ago | Draft 2


A thoughtful adventure about the dichotomy between men and women. Think 1984 meets The Handmaid's Tale meets Star Wars.

Industry Reviews

LAVENDER is a good action Sci-Fi but to be great it needs to delve into and develop the main character, Lavender. She needs a clear arc that solves a flaw in her character and to control and drive the story, which she doesn’t do at the moment. When that is achieved, then we’ll feel much more emotionally engaged in the great action scenes and really care about the outcome and thrill with every blow and setback and victory.

3 months ago |
Blaise Hesselgren Top Reviewer

Peer Reviews

The formatting and pacing is well done. There are a couple of details that can be easily fixed. For example, "spanish" is with a capital S. Watch for passive wording. "is wailing" needs to be "wails", "He starts crying" needs to be "He cries.", "is screaming," to "screams". There are minor spelling errors that can be easily taken care of, "Actiavting". Overall, I liked the story and pacing. It really drew me into your film. the mystery of the blu...

4 months ago |
LAVENDER Script Notes

-Very cool intro into your world.
-Lavender is mostly reactive besides the first glimpse we catch of her dancing. I’m not sure why she’s so queasy and jittery if her mother is in charge. You’d think she’d be used to it all by now...
-Page 9: I like how you introduce us to Krista, establish her friendship (or maybe more?) with Lavender and give us some exposition about what’s going on in this man-free world.
-Page 10:...

1 year ago |

Recommended for You

A tech mogul turns his son's childhood superhero drawing into a high-tech superhero suit that his son uses to fight a female terrorist with the same technology.
On the night of a blood moon, an undead monk comes to a shopping mall to revenge himself upon his vampiric kin.
Two zany songwriters join a tipsy Englishman, his daughter, and a goofy helicopter pilot, rob some con men, run into trouble, and wind up in a horse-drawn wagon chase through Mexico.