Wanna See
2

The Trip

short
By Matt Gorman
Sci-Fi/Fantasy

The hole truth

Approved
Nominee
Draft #2
Winner
Draft #1
Peer Rating: 80%
Industry Rating: N/A
Draft 2: 80%
Draft 1: 80%
2 Reviews | 20 pages | 6 months ago | Draft 2

Summary

The last two survivors of an alien attack on a remote space station try to escape, but where can they go?

I see this as a stand-alone episode for a half hour sci-fi/fantasy/horror tv series a la Twilight Zone. It may also be part of an anthology feature (along with my other short Vector) whose working title is Heroines.

Industry Reviews

Peer Reviews

In a span of a few pages, I was mentally visioning a blend of "Drunna", an erotic science fiction and fantasy comic book character created by Italian cartoonist Paolo Eleuteri Serpieri and the horror movie "The Sand", also titled "Blood Sand", is a 2015 American monster movie directed by Isaac Gabaeff. Spongy tubes, hair sized tendrils, and alien flesh congeal in & outside of a lander craft to consume the fleshy humans within.

Regina moves fro...

6 months ago | read more...
Teaser is really good, it reminded me of Arrival, the emotion of discovering something new.

The beggining of act one, pages 2 to 6, is less stellar in my opinion. It's basically exposition.

Pages 7 and 8. I didn't get the conversation with the Woman. At the very least it lacked conflict. And the resolution, the "I'm sorry" came out of nowhere.

Page 13. It is disappointed that this series of shots aren't developed more. Instead of the two...

5 months ago | read more...
T. Cuesta Top Reviewer
This a very scary and interestingly dark script. I love it! Like serious I’m in the edge of my seat wait for Carey and Broussard to kill that creepy thing and escape. Pros: I love the structure of your script. I Didn’t find one error in the structure. I also love your delivery and how you each highlighted their differences in their personalities and seriousness/ humor that the characters portray. They are fighting for their lives for Christ sak...

6 months ago | read more...
Here are my thoughts on your short:

1. Concept - I really liked the idea of a crew being stuck inside of an alien like creature that have fallen under from its gas. I also enjoyed you adding trypophobia into this to add more to the horror.

2. Story - The story, while not the most original, was still very well written out. It was clean, intriguing, and knew where it was going.

3. Structure - The formatting and structuring is incredibly cl...

6 months ago | read more...
Cyle Brooks Top Reviewer

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