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Identity crisis

Short

After losing the only love of her life, a transgender loses all hope of finding love again and kills herself.

Approved
Nominee
Draft #3
Rating is only available to members
Drama | 5 Reviews | 23 pages | 6 months ago | Draft 3

Summary

In Africa, a part of the world where transgenders hide themselves forever, Victoria was no different. All her life, the one thing she wanted was to love and be loved. Her father rejected her. She had no friends growing up. But then a time came when she found love or so she thought and lost it.

Reviews

The script in my opinion should have italics for instructions and font or type sizes for dialogue. It was hard to follow in some instances because I was trying to read the instructions but thought I was in the dialogue. I believe the transitions could be better especially if you are going from a room to a hospital delivery room. Some grammatical errors that can be cleaned up and smooth out some of the dialogue can make a great story.
In the ho...

6 months ago | read more...
Ike Rayford Top Reviewer
I am going to go through this review similar to a checklist. Starting with the concept which I might say is original and not corresponding with any other movie/short story I have ever seen, but I don't watch these types of movies so I'm not sure. The logline/first ten pages drew me in mainly because I wanted to know how the character was going to commit suicide, but not because of the bathroom scene that was worthless to the story. Some scenes ar...

5 months ago | read more...
I really loved Victoria character. Being part of the LGBTQ community myself a lot of the fears she had and the hesitation about loving and letting someone get close to you resonated with me. I'm sure there are plenty of people regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity will connect with her.

4 months ago | read more...
Tyke Spaide Top Reviewer
This is a very unique and important idea for the world we are currently living in, especially with the recent pushes for title 9 reforms. I believe that the storyline is very good. Overall, it is entertaining and will keep people entertained. I feel like you have some good visuals as well.
When this gets made, it will be a struggle to find an actor/ress to play Victoria unless you want to use extensive realistic prosthetics which quickly can ge...

3 months ago | read more...
Although the concept of your short is not original, i.e. a transsexual person being outed at the workplace, parts of how you deliver it are original. The Flashback approach gives the script a unique perspective. There are some grammatical errors in both the action sequences and in the dialogue that would help quicken the pace of the story, however, beyond technical errors the script moves along well. Your main character Victoria might benefit fro...

3 months ago | read more...

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