What would you do with a second chance?
Elvira Deuntjes is a singer who is trying to make ends meet. She is going for an audition to sing the Christmas songs for a company but completely messes up the audition. The 2econd Chance store, however, offers the opportunity, to fix your mistakes by going back in time. Will Elvira be able to fix her mistake?
There were TONS of structural missteps, typos and confusing dialogue throughout. Every time you used "we see" or "we hear" it reminded me I was reading a script, which isn't the idea.
None of the characters are introduced, so it feels random when, boom, a new person begins to speak. The dialogue at times didn't match the action going on, which caused confusion...
Elvira's motivation is to get a job. That is motivating but there could be a stronger reason as to why she's so desperate to get a job, which will help raise the stakes and make getting the job even more important.
The idea that a customer's memory is wiped clean between the moments of time travel is clever and it adds a good twist to th...