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Floating In The Rain...


When Asure, who suffers from mental illness, meets Ahmad, a bond forms that changes both of their lives.

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Drama | 2 Reviews | 83 pages | 7 months ago | Draft 2


Fearful, jaded, and cold, are a few words that describe Asure Baptiste. An early 30's millennial who deals with mental illness. One day, she meets Ahmad Jackson, a new employee at her job, and they begin on a new journey to enlightenment and self-awareness. All while Asure deals with an ex-boyfriend who she just can't seem to let go.


After reading this script, I'd say it needs alot of work.

First and foremost, I want to stay positive, and the best thing about this script is the Structure.

It's a linear story set in the present day, which is simple, but it isn't bogged down with unnecessary flashbacks. The premise is also simple, but that simplicity allows for a detailed character study to unfold.
The only issue with the structure is the pacing. The characters connect w...

6 months ago |
First of, let me congratulate you on capturing emotions on paper so well that at some point, I began to root for Asure and Ahmad to succeed and be together. You did well. Congratulation!!!!!
On concept, it is good. Most concepts are good but the problem often lies on how the project is executed. Don't worry, I will get into the specs soon. Meanwhile, the concept is okay. It will make a good drama story. One full of tears.
The logline needs work...

1 month ago |

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