Three 'greatest generation' women get the help of a local thug to dive into a life of crime preventing foreclosure of their private assisted living home which will, in turn, keep the other residents there from being evicted and homeless.
This is a hit and miss comedy. There is some severe situations (like rape) that would not work in a PG13 movie. Is this a black comedy? If not, for a comedy this doesn’t have enough laughs. There are some scenes you do a great job, I can picture the comedy. But much of the time it reads like a weak TV show. If these are old women where is the physical comedy? They aren’t nimble, they aren’t strong, they aren’t fast. You are going to have to work on upping the stakes in each scene, which will set up the absurdity that generates laughs.
There are movies that have done this senior crime theme, Going In Style came out last year for example. The key difference is the seniors stuck it to the bank that cheated them of their pension. Your story has the women sticking it to… society? If you want to include a social justice message then that would be an amazing comedy. But I don’t see that is your point other than there brief speech when they are arrested.
You have done a fine job developing scenes and the dialogue and tone matched the characters. The story develops nicely and the script reads pretty well. Your logline does not match the script. In the script it talks about their home, which is not being kept up, and not an assisted living home – because other than Gordon no one is ever at the house with the leads in the script.
If they are from the Greatest Generation then they are in their late 70s to mid 80s. Most would have a hard time holding up a semi-automatic weapons let alone have the strength to shoot accurately. Now this is a comedy so real world physics don’t need to come into play. But having them shoot inaccurately ALL the time would be funny. By playing out their physical limitations, along with people’s soft approach to old women, they could get away with a lot.